Postpartum Depression: Joanna's Story - Episode 2
Part 2 of this story continues as Joanna reflects on her postpartum depression and how it began destroying all aspects of her life including her marriage. Unable to lose the weight from her pregnancy coupled with lack of motivation and a marriage on the brim of deterioration, led Joanna further into a desolate realm. She wonders what it would have been like to seek treatment or just ask for help.
Some of the worst parts of the postpartum depression just feeling like I didn't want to do anything. I didn't want to be bothered by anybody. I was really down on myself about the weight. I couldn't lose the weight. After having my son at 19, I could exercise and lose the weight pretty quickly. And with my daughter, I just felt like nothing was budging no matter what I did. Postpartum depression definitely effected my marriage. I felt like I was stuck at home, and I had this baby, and that's all my life consisted of. It was being unhappy and staying home and taking care of this baby that I love so much, but where was that happiness that you're suppose to feel.
I was devastated to think of the concept of having a broken up family. The dynamics of a broken up family forever. My daughter was only 2. My son was 9. He was at an age where I knew how tremendously he was going to be affected. I wanted nothing more than to keep my family together. Then I didn't understand how the marriage was destroying me. I should have filled that script for medication, now that I look back. Gosh, my life would have been so much easier if I had just taken that script to the pharmacy and started, you know, on a anti-depressant. But you just don't know. You feel you can overcome anything and sometimes you just can't.